Day 126+, Past 4 months post-op

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Originally uploaded by megalitz

So, I haven't blogged in quite a while, it's probably been good for me. Today is actually day 126, but you'll be happy to know I have actually stopped counting UP the days. Now I'm back to counting down. Now I'm counting down the days until I go to boxing class (1), until I can try to run (16), until I can REALLY run, play soccer, walk in the middle of the night, things like that.

I had my 4 month post op appt last Friday. I went in with a long list of questions, anticipating the worst, ready to discuss all the pain and swelling and the many days I have ahead with more of the same. I was half right. I have more days of the pain and swelling. However, he said this is normal, which I figured at this point was not. Apparently I am crazy. He again reiterated "we CUT OFF your heel..." yeah yeah yeah, I got it. But at what point do we get to stop saying that, and I'm supposed to just be "OK?" Apparently this sort of thing doesn't happen with reconstructive surgery. It's apparently a pretty big deal. :)

ANYWAYS...the doc said I am WAY ahead of schedule. Shocked me! He said for being only 4 mos post op, I have much more functionality in my foot/ankle than he thought I would. Awesome! He was impressed at how well I was walking. Laughed at my sunburn. (Was taking good care to cover up my scars in the sun, forgot about the rest of my foot, ouch)! And said if walking goes well I can try running in 3-4 weeks. I asked him if he was sure. He looked me, puzzled, and I told him I just wanted to check, because as soon as he says I can run, I'm not going to stop. :) He understood. I love this guy. He is the best surgeon ever. I wish he would have done my previous surgeries as well!

So I feel good. I think. :) When people ask how my ankle is doing I honestly, never know what to say. "Based on what?!" I think. Compared to right before surgery? Well, it's a hell of a lot stronger, but I'm in much more pain and can barely walk. But it's better. And compared to 6 weeks ago, it feels amazing! And compared to what it hopefully will feel like in 6 months? It feels horrible! :) It's a very complicated question. I still don't know what to say.

I put dress shoes on for the first time last Saturday. You can see the line of where the shoe came up to in this picture. It forced all the swelling up. It was disgusting. I'm going to try boxing tomorrow. I'm excited. I think. And nervous. I can bike. I can walk. I can swim. I can do the elliptical..well, sort of. I can only bear it for 10 minutes or so. Everything from my ankle to my knee seems to snap in and out, its extremely uncomfortable. But I don't have to crawl to go to the restroom in the middle of the night. I can kind of walk. It hurts like hell, but I can do it.

Doc wants to remove the screws at 6 mos post op, b/c it is giving me too much pain he said. And, he is right. I'm hoping that in these next 2 mos, the pain subsides and I can live with the screw in my heel. But seriously, you can feel the screw head through my skin. I can't wear shoes really. It hurts! I figured this would happen. He said it's an "easy" procedure. Compared to what?! Mentally, I CANNOT handle this again so soon. But he said they barely put me under, make an incision, grab their drill, unscrew the screw, and I walk out of the OR with the screw in a doggy bag. No down time. Yeah, right. Whatever. This sucks. It really, really, really sucks. But...it's going to be worth it. I know it.

There are already things I can do now that I never could have done before surgery. Like, stand on one foot, for instance. It is painful, but i can do it! I don't fall over like an idiot! That makes me so happy. Gosh, I can't wait until I'm back in the game!

Cheers!